First Week of Vrtic

It has been a very exciting week! Elijah started vrtic again, but without Israel. He has seemed a bit sad this week going into vrtic, but today I see him brightening up a little. His teacher says it's normal as Israel doesn't go to school with him anymore. Its the first time they have been apart since Israel was 3 and Elijah was 2! I'm proud of my big boy.

He was also asked tonight to join Israel in Mirela's wedding later this month. Israel will be the flower girl and Elijah will carry the back of Mirela's dress down the aisle. Boy did it make his day! My two little cuties were bouncing up and down tonight after they got the news. I'm one proud mama! Israel will meet her teacher for school on Saturday and will start first grade on Monday. We are excited for this transition but I would be lying if I said I'm not a little sentimental too! Israel and I spent the day together carrying on the tradition of shopping for a new outfit for school, lunch and a special dessert. She is growing up and becoming quite the lady! Thanks for reading what's going on on Irby Road. Hoping to be more frequent posting on here!

Swimming, Tennis and Beach...oh MY!

It's been a busy summer here at Irby Road!

It all started with an exciting trip to Neum, a city about 4 hours away from Sarajevo right on the coast. Our landlady from Svaki Student center owns a beautiful pension very close to the water. We had 17 students join our summer project and staff for a few days on the beach. My MOM was able to join in the fun too! She flew in for the beach trip. We also spent a few days on another coastal town (Orebic) for some time with just our team:

Since then, we have been to Jahorina (Olympic mountain) with our church, taking 10 students with us. A highlight for us was hiking and blueberry picking. It was wonderful to escape the Sarajevo HEAT.

Israel and Elijah have had an adventurous summer. They had a very sweet reunion with some of their very best friends in all the world, Mani and Pippa. These sweet children are from England. They all attended preschool together until January when they had to move back to England. One of the hardest parts of being a "third culture kid" is the good byes. There are so many. Saying goodbye to Mani and Pippa was the hardest thing our children have encountered since moving here. Needless to say they were totally blessed to have them in Sarajevo the entire month of August! They had two sleepovers:

And two weeks of swimming lessons. The kids went from not being able to swim without lots of assistance to swimming free style! Their coach was wonderful. We are considering more lessons in the future. Josh also taught a tennis camp for children. We gathered 11 children plus Israel and Elijah. There were children from Bosnia, America, Turkey, England and Denmark. Here's a picture of the 9 am group:

and 10 am group:

We took a family vacation to Neum and stayed in the same apartment. The kids loved practicing their new swimming skills!

On the way back we stopped at an old Dervish house and I got to enter the Dervish prayer house with proper covering.

Adeline loved the water too. She turned 10 months old! Time is really flying with this sweet, precious baby. She has a great sense of humor and keeps us busy.

One student, Sanel, invited us to visit his family's home in a village nearby. We enjoyed being with his family for a cookout and spending time in nature, hiking through the forest and running in the fields!

In addition, the kids have started to learn to ride their bikes without training wheels. As I type, Israel and Josh are at the first annual Sarajevo Chamber Music Festival. The Manhattan String Quartet is playing for the entire week. I attended last night with Israel. She really wanted to go again tonight. Although Josh and I are very tired from a busy day, how can we pass up taking our six year old to hear classical music?! Tonight they will hear Beethoven, Dvorak and Arensky!

It has been a busy summer indeed. I can't believe that in one week, Elijah will begin vrtic (preschool). It will be a different year for him, being without Israel. I'm excited for him to branch out and make some new friends not connected with Israel. If you think of him, please say a quick prayer that he will be brave going all on his own! And in two weeks, my little Izzy will begin FIRST GRADE! It's a big deal! She will go to a big school. We have chosen the Catholic Center in Sarajevo. It has a wonderful reputation and we know many people who have sent their children there. The school is beautiful and we look forward to seeing Israel branch out and meet new friends. Like Elijah, it may be hard to be without her little brother, but we are believing that she will make many new friends! Josh and I are both working on making new fitness goals. Josh has been riding his bike and running. I have been swimming (during the kids' lessons...50 laps!) and riding my birthday bike. :) I'm also wanting to write on here more, so look for more blog posts soon! Would love to hear from all of you and about your lives. Facebook only reveals so much!

Quick update

Irby family still busy and doing fine! Josh is trying hard to finish his book on Miss Irby's life in the next couple of weeks. The kids are still enjoying vrtic although sometimes they ask to go back to their old vrtic and often they ask if they can just stay home with a sitter! But the vrtic is really good for them and they are already making friends.
Sarajevo is once again covered in snow and it's just really beautiful. The snow is powdery so there is not much ice, which is a good thing. Not a lot of slipping around!

Has anyone started a gift list? I got to 100 the other day. Here are some things from my list yesterday:
...Josh made dinner last night
...My mom read a book to the kids that her mom read to her when she was little over skype (gotta love technology)
...the way the snow falls so delicately from the sky
...a city covered in a blanket of snow

Life is more colorful and you live more awake when counting the gifts God has given. I always remember my Nannie (who is now 100 and still fully alive and well!) "Count your blessings count them one by one, count your blessings see what God has done!"

How to Fight Fair

Hello all!
It has been a busy week here at Irby Road. On Monday the kids started their first day of vrtic (preschool). We have been waiting for space at this school for 6 months so it was really exciting to finally send them. It sounds like a great place. They have a singing circle, different crafts every day, puppet shows, acting, play instruments, cook, and have a great deal of outdoor play. Here's a picture of them at their first day. Aren't they cute?




Last night we spoke at our Svaki student cafe. The theme was Valentine's day so Josh and I decided to talk about conflict and how to "fight fair". We started with a fake fight about forgetting the notes. It was hard not to laugh (I'm not the best actress) but I think it got the point across on how NOT to argue! We talked about laying ground rules before there is a conflict so that when you are fighting you can remember the boundaries you have set. Here are the ground rules:

DO NOT:
Generalize: Stay away from using terms such as "always" and "never" (you ALWAYS do that, you NEVER do that!)
Speak non- truth: hurtful words you don't truly mean and you will regret later
Threaten: with physical harm or with leaving forever. Josh and I have a promise that we will never mention the "D" word or even entertain the possibility of leaving each other for good.
Leave: There is a healthy leaving referred to as "Time Out" but it needs to be used properly. Instead of huffing off mad and running to a place where the conflict can be avoided and maybe even forgotten, Time Out has to be verbalized. "Can we talk about this in an hour? I'm really mad right now and I don't want to say anything I will regret. I need some time to clear my head and think." My coping mechanism in conflict is to run away angry. This never helps and should be avoided. Josh knows it's my weak spot so when he sees me start to turn, he lovingly takes my shoulder and draws me back in.

DO:
Stay Calm: Avoid raising your voice. This is where Time Out can come in handy!
Use "I" instead of "you": State how you feel without accusing the other person
Apologize: This is a big one. From the beginning of marriage, we have tried our best in conflict to search the conflict to see where we could possibly be wrong. Even if you feel totally innocent and that the other is COMPLETELY at fault, find some place where you said the wrong thing, responded wrong, etc.
Forgive: Again, another biggie for us. Not just for us, but for the whole family. When someone says "I'm sorry" (according to a sin committed against the other, not in a total accident), we never respond with "It's okay." This implies that the offense was not heavy or was just "nothing". When you respond with "I forgive you" it does something within both people. For the one apologizing it makes them feel the weight of what they did, and the sacrifice the other person took to forgive them. For the one giving forgiveness it makes them search the soul and truly offer forgiveness. Such power in words!

We closed with 1 Corinthians 13, the ever familiar love chapter of the Bible:
Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.

I hope this helps a bit in all your relationships, be it romantic, friendships, children/parent, work....

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY! (and happy birthday to my Mamma, Sylvia Sharron!)

Israel and Elijah's Prvi Dan...Izzy: Vrtic, Elijah: childcare

Yesterday (Monday) was Israel's first day of Vrtic (pronounced "VER-teech"). We left and she agreed to do three things: not to cry when I leave, smile at one person, and learn one new Bosnian word. I left and she wasn't crying, so that is a good thing! I dropped Elijah off with Merima, our babysitter. While they were there (Elijah from 8-11, Izzy from 8-12) I studied Bosnian then went grocery shopping. I picked up Elijah and he was so happy. He kept saying "Had...fun...Merima" over and over and over again...all the way to Israel's school. Israel was crying when I got there, but her teacher said she had only been crying for about 15 minutes. I asked her if she had learned a new Bosnian word. Israel said, "yes...I learned LIST. It means leaf!" That is true, and I am happy. It's a sweet little school and I hope Israel will be happy there.

The highlight of the day was Ballet class. The previous night we had gone to a park and ran into one of her ballet classmates, Sarah. Izzy and Sarah played the entire time and were instant friends. When we arrived at Ballet, Sarah's mom Lejla said that Sarah had been asking "where's Izzy?" Both Sarah and Lejla only speak Bosnian. We were praying for friends who don't speak English so it will force us to talk! As soon as Israel entered her class, she got a huge smile on her face and ran to Sarah. The two were inseparable and Israel had a smile on her face the entire hour! What an answer to prayer! Tonight, Sarah, Lejla, Israel and I are going to the National Theater to see the ballet's production of "Palcica" (Thumbelina). We are excited!

Thank you all for praying for us. Pray for more good days like yesterday!